Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
