things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
