Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize