Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
