Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Boobs are out for the taking
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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