So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
