last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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