My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
