Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
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