I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
