A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
