I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
