I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
