I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
