susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize
