Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
