I heard we made out
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
