So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
