Your face is a jimmy john
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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