Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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