Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
