So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
