I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
