Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
