We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
