the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
