Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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