In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
