He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
