I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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