we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
