Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
