I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
