You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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