Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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