Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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