You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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