just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
