I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
