I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
