I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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