My room smells like vodka and shame
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
