I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize