May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
