Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
