He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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