I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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