Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
accomplished twins. life is a go
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
The struggles of a small town man whore
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
