from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
being pregnant is like rehab
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
