Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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