I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
